Marriage Is a Private Affair Essay Topic Text

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Critical perspectives and the short story marriage is a private affair september 22, 2010 the initial emotional response i received from this story was that the father was not willing to budge from his beliefs and the ways of his tribe. By doing this i was confused as to how he could turn his back on his own child because he found happiness with a woman that was not a part of their tribe. At the end of the story i understood what the father had gone through and that his tribe and beliefs had caused him so much pain and suffering.

The end also left me thinking that he was ready to give in to his urge to see his grandchildren and finally meet his son’s wife. The characters in this story are very strong at heart and have plenty to give to the world and each other. The son was very firm in his decision to marry out of love and not tradition and i liked that about him. The wife was very strong to deal with such a situation that was out of her hands and showed a great amount of grace to not hold anything against the father and his actions.

The father was noble in keeping the tribes beliefs and traditions that he grew up with, although it was very painful to me to watch him suffer for so long knowing that his son had made choices that were not in favor of the traditions of their tribe. This is always good in a story like this because you can either make a happy ending out of this or make this story about the father’s loyalty to his tradition and tribal ways and what he sacrificed to prove his loyalty. I will apply sociological theory and psychological theory to determine my conclusion. She is a modern young nigerian woman who wants to be accepted by her husband’s father. Naemeka – young nigerian man from the igbo tribe who has moved to the city of lagos and has fallen in love with nene. He realizes that his father will not approve of his marriage but he goes ahead and marries the woman he loves. Okeke – naemake’s father very religious a rule follower believes in traditional view that marriages should be arranged by the families, that people should never marry outside of their own tribe.

He is the most dynamic character in the story and undergoes the greatest change when he feels remorse for rejecting his daughter in law and plans to make it up to her as soon as possible at the end of the story. Ugoye nweke – woman that naemeka’s father has arranged for him to marry plot summary exposition a young man from an igbo village meets a young ibibio woman in the city of lagos, nigeria. The young woman wants the young man to send a letter to his father telling him of their engagement. The young man is hesitant because he knows his father has already arranged for him to marry a young igbo woman from his village, in accordance with traditional customs.

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Rising action external conflict person against person – son and father oppose each other in deciding whom the son will marry. Person against society – initially, the whole village agrees with the father that marrying outside of one’s tribe is dangerous, that sons should not arrange their own marriages, and the people from the village who visit the city treat the young wife overly politely. Internal conflict – the father clings to his opinion and refuses to forgive his son or to acknowledge his daughter in law. The father refuses to allow his son to visit and never visits them, for eight years.

Even though the villagers who have met nene in the city have come to accept and think well of her, they are scared to even mention her to the father. Climax – the father receives a letter from naemeka, begging him to accept a visit from her son and two grandsons she says she will stay away in the city if he will only let the grandsons come visit him. A strong storm, the first of the year, brings rain to the land at the same time as he is reading the letter and changing his heart. The hard dry unforgiving father changes and the sudden severe weather symbolizes the severe change in his opinion, just as the hard earth is softened and refreshed by the rain, his stubborn feelings have been softened by his daughter in laws concern and love for her children and her wish for them to meet their grandfather. The story ends with the father feeling great sorrow over his actions remorse , and hoping that he can live long enough to make amends to his son and daughter –in law and their family. Themes author’s message of the story – conflict between traditional and modern ways need for understanding in a family the price of stubbornness – hurts the stubborn person and the people he is ignoring. Summary/paraphrase chinua achebe – marriage is a private affair setting – the action of this story.

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Nnaemeka knew what he was getting himself into, and yet he kept it from both his father and his fiance. He knew his father wouldn't understand what he felt towards nene, and he also knew nene wouldn't understand his father's traditional thinking. Nnaemeka should have explained that part of his life to nene when they were beginning to get serious but perhaps he didn't think he wanted to marry her then. She is living her own independent life without worries of satisfying someone else. To her marriage is a beautiful thing no matter who you marry as long as you love that person. But nnaemeka knows it won't be easy: they are most unhappy if the engagement is not arranged by them.

Perhaps nnaemeka was hoping that his father would take his sons happiness over the people's happiness. To my son nnaemeka may the good lord bless you as you read my letter i received a letter from your wife telling about the interest of your sons my grandsons to see their grandfather. It would likewise be cruel not to express the strangeness that seated in my heart upon learning about the two boys p when you were a young lad. Once we get to the river you would ask me to let you go of your hand so you could run towards the river and have a good wash in the clear water. These moments in my mind created in me a slight fear that one day you would ask to be on your own.

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The recollections of those times i let go of your hand near the river doomed to me like mud and sand that were pushed aside by the gush of the river. Each night became a remorseful time i spent deeply thinking where i have gone wrong and what made you dissuade from my decision but the thoughts of you in the clear water and the smile on your face as you take a plunge haunt me now more adamantly as i think of your two lads. Just like you in the clear waters of ryunuke at this time i am not ready to accept your wife in my house but your mother would probably be glad to do so while the two of us and my two grandsons have a small picnic at the same old river.