Do you know students who want critical essay reviews from a professor of english literature? click like to share. A call to service college essay with a free review in the space provided, please write a concise narrative in which you describe a meaningful event, experience or accomplishment in your life and how it will affect your college experience or your contribution to the uf campus community. You may want to reflect on your ideas about student responsibility, academic integrity, campus citizenship or a call to service. I remember riding innocently in a small truck, looking out the window adjacent to me. Ascending vast mountains and rocky hills i saw two little black eyes peeking through a half broken door. My eyes followed them in bewilderment little did i understand the situation that surrounded me. This was only four years ago when i visited an unfortunate community in colombia, trapped in the sustenance of poverty.

I remember looking up at my mother, whose face was filled with frustration and grief, but i remained silent. We arrived in an area where there were lines of children, dressed in rags and dirt, waiting for a bowl of porridge. There was a chain of women and men all around the community handing out toys, shirts, and even a nice pair of shoes for the children. I was handed a basket of lemons to make gallons of juice and bread to make over thousands of hot dogs. Remembering the famous quote when life gives you lemons, i decided to be of prominent assistance and place immense love into my job for the day. Life gave me a gift and a responsibility to perform not only a heavy duty, but to collaborate in an outstanding organization such as mira, a social movement that began in colombia itself.

Realizing all that i had to be grateful for, i apologized to the air for every moment i wasn’t elated. Before performing my function, i strolled down the rugged roads to take a personal look at the impoverished homes. I perceived a two year old pulling up his bottoms after going to the bathroom outside his door. Although a heart breaking experience, the ultimate remembrance of this day was the enormous smile that lay on each of the toddlers’ faces when receiving food and drink. This meaningful event will always stay entrenched in my heart as i know it will serve me to be sincerely devoted and intrigued in every aspect of life, especially at the university of florida where i aspire to achieve all my academic goals and dreams. The integrity and call to service that i possess have allowed me to value every detail in my path, becoming aware of my environment and of those in need.

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One way to make this more concise would be to try to eliminate all of the modifiers adjectives and adverbs. Doing that would be a useful exercise in any case, since it would force you not only to eliminate words you don't need, but sometimes add words you do. For instance i remember riding innocently in a small truck would become i remember riding in a truck. Now we don't know that the truck was small, but, seriously, who cares? we also don't know that you were riding innocently, but since we didn't know what that meant in the first place, again, who cares? however, if you want to insist on your innocent nature here, then without adjectives or adverbs, you're forced to be specific and that's a good thing about what you are innocent in relation to. For instance, you might write, before we drove through the colombian mountains in a truck, i didn't really know what poverty was.

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That takes more words, but for the amount of information communicated, it's still more concise. Anyway, see if you can get rid of the rest of the modifiers it's not always this easy, but it should be easy to delete words like ultimate and enormous . The prompt asks you to tell about a meaningful event, which you do, and to explain how it will affect your college experience, which you don't do, except in the vaguest terms. You say you'll remember the event and that it will serve wrong word you to be sincerely devoted and intrigued in every aspect of your life. For example, you might be devoted to never being poor, so you will be pursuing your business degree assiduously so you don't end up like those kids in colombia or you might be devoted, having seen what you’ve seen, to ending world hunger, so you've decided to focus all of your efforts on the pursuit of expertise in genetically modifying food.

Or if it’s nothing specific like that, then maybe seeing hungry kids in horrible conditions was enough to convince you to eschew the trivial and devote yourself to stuff that matters, and that’s going to be your approach to college. Finally, the prompt suggests that you might want to think about integrity or responsibility or some other characteristics. The sentence in which you allude to integrity and call to service as things you possess call to service is not a characteristic you can possess is, i'm sorry to say, practically meaningless. I don't know what path you refer to, what details you refer to, what valuing those details entails, how any of that relates to integrity, and how the question of integrity relates to anything else in your essay. Try rewriting a few times until you get a sentence that is true for you and represents an insight that might a reasonably be attributable to your experience in colombia and b be suggestive of your determination to be an honest, hardworking student. Then delete the sentence about integrity and call to service and replace it with the sentence about responsibility.

Then delete the final sentence of the present version of your last paragraph and the final sentence of the first paragraph, and change the word sustenance to something else. Final piece of advice: you will sound a lot more sincere if you stop trying to sound so very sincere. College essay help, writing help welcome to writemyessay.today one of the best custom paper writing services on the web.

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