are you trapped in a nightly homework struggle with your child? the list of excuses can seem endless: ldquo i don rsquo t have any homework today. Rdquo if only your child could be that creative with their actual homework, getting good grades would be no problem! pre teens and teens often insist they have no homework even when they do, or tell parents that they rsquo ve completed their assignments at school when they haven rsquo t. If your child rsquo s grades are acceptable and you receive positive reports from their teachers, congratulations ndash your child is doing just fine.

James lehman advises that students who are doing well have earned the privilege of doing their homework whenever and however they see fit. But if their grades reflect missing assignments, or your child rsquo s teachers tell you that they rsquo re falling behind, you need to institute some new homework practices in your household. For those classes in which your child is doing poorly, they lose the privilege of doing homework in an unstructured way. For the classes they are doing well in, they can continue to do that homework on their own. related: tired of fighting over homework every night? trying to convince your child that grades are important can be a losing battle. You can rsquo t make your child take school as seriously as you do the truth is, they don rsquo t typically think that way. Remember, as james says, it rsquo s not that they aren rsquo t motivated, it rsquo s that they rsquo re motivated to do what they want to do.

In order to get your child to do their homework, you have to focus on their behavior, not their motivation. So instead of giving them a lecture, focus on their behavior and their homework skills. Let them know that completing homework and getting passing grades are not optional. If you rsquo re facing the rest of the school year with dread and irritation, you rsquo re not alone.

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The total transformation program recommends that whether your child has homework or not, create a mandatory homework time each school day for those classes in which you child is doing poorly. Use the ldquo 10 minute rule formulated by the national pta and the national education association, which recommends that kids should be doing about 10 minutes of homework per night per grade level. In other words, 10 minutes for first graders, 20 for second graders and so forth. For example, you might schedule homework time for the classes that your child is doing poorly in to begin at p.m. If your child says they have no homework in those subjects, then they can spend that time reading ahead in their textbooks, making up missed work, working on extra credit projects, or studying for tests. If they say ldquo i forgot my books at school, rdquo have them read a book related to one of their subjects.

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By making study time a priority, you will sidestep all those excuses and claims of ldquo no homework today. Rdquo if your child has to spend a few days doing ldquo busy work rdquo during the daily homework time, you may even find that they bring home more actual assignments! related: the three important roles every parent should play, explained: coach, teacher and limit setter. use a public space it rsquo s important to monitor your child rsquo s homework time. For families where both parents work, you may need to schedule it in the evening.

In many instances it may be more productive to have your child do their homework in a public space. That means the living room or the kitchen, or some place equally public where you can easily check in on them. Let them know they can ask for help if they need it, but allow them to do their own work. If your child would like to do his or her homework in their room, let them know that they can earn that privilege back when they have pulled up the grades in the subjects in which they are doing poorly. use daily incentives let your child know that they will have access to privileges when they have completed their homework. For example, you might say, ldquo once you rsquo ve completed your homework time, you are free to use your electronics or see your friends.

Rdquo be clear with your child about the consequences for refusing to study, or for putting their work off until later. According to james lehman, consequences should be short term, and should fit the ldquo crime. Rdquo you might say, ldquo if you choose not to study during the scheduled time, you will lose your electronics for the night.

Rdquo the next day, your child gets to try again ndash observing her homework time and earning her privileges. Don rsquo t take away privileges for more than a day, as your child will have no incentive to do better the next time. related: free downloadable behavior charts from empowering parents ! work towards something bigger remember, kids don rsquo t place as much importance on schoolwork as you do. As you focus on their behavior, not their motivation, you should begin to see some improvement in their homework skills.

You can use your child rsquo s motivation to your advantage if they have something they rsquo d like to earn. For example, if your child would like to get his driver rsquo s permit, you might encourage him to earn that privilege by showing you he can complete his homework appropriately. You might say, ldquo in order to feel comfortable letting you drive, i need to see that you can follow rules, even when you don rsquo t agree with them. When you can show me that you can complete your homework appropriately, i rsquo d be happy to sit down and talk with you about getting your permit.

Rdquo if your child starts complaining about the homework rule, you can say, ldquo i know you want to get that driver rsquo s permit. You need to show me you can follow a simple rule before i rsquo ll even talk to you about it. Rdquo by doing this, you sidestep all the arguments around both the homework and the permit. related: how to give consequences that work. skills + practice success 2 days ago updated 2 days ago byron garrett author, entrepreneur, education advocate we lead very busy lives and we too easily forget how hard it was for us to focus on homework when we were in school. Now that we have jobs to do, food to buy and cook and other errands to run, even i sometimes think that it would be a welcome change to have to sit down and quietly read and write with no distractions. But, in case you don't remember homework is pretty much every child's least favorite thing to do.

It can sometimes almost be too hard to even keep up with all the new tech advances our kids are using, so how can we make sure that those advances take a backseat to our children's education? here are some ideas: don't fight the tech devices. there's no point in stopping the inevitable reality that young people are going to focus on their phones and tablets instead of other things at times. Your best bet is to embrace it, actually: the tech sector continues to be the most lucrative and fast growing industries and that's unlikely to change fast. Ask your teacher and school staff what apps and web sites they're using to teach lessons and supplement them with at home activities as well. if you build it, they will come. even though technology has changed, the basics haven't. If you want to read, write and think properly, you need to have peace and quiet and the ability to focus, right? well, your kids are just the same. Try and find a space in your home to enable the young people in your life to do work away from the den of televisions, streaming radio or other distractions of every day life. I feel like i'm my most productive working alone in an office or at a busy café with my headphones on.

Being able to move focus away from my work and get lost in other realities helps my creativity flow. The best thing is ask your child what would make them most comfortable and to accommodate those needs. Placing them in isolation can often have an adverse effect and doesn't always equal being more productive, get engaged. i feel like this is always a big part of my advice for parents on just about everything. How can you make sure your child is being successful if you have no idea what they're doing? how can you be sure they're doing it right if you don't know what is the correct answer? what kind of incentive do they need? you should be in touch with your student's teacher, have a sense of where the lessons are going, what kinds of assignments are being given and what success looks like in the classroom. Knowing all of that is key to your child's success, especially when matched with some encouraging praise and helpful tips on how they can keep going. Having a reward structure might not hurt as well thinking about how your child is best motivated to other things and employing those tactics here within reason isn't a bad idea. And if by chance you're having trouble solving that algebra equation or diagraming a sentence, don't fear, you are not alone.